Amy's Graduation at Liverpool Anglican Cathedral 2014

Lord Roby used to spend quite bit of time as a wayward child exploring Liverpool's Anglican Cathedral. This came in rather useful on July 14th.With only two tickets available per graduate Lord Roby had had his nose pushed out.Not having that, I went to the back and found a long lost entrance. Within minutes I was behind the altar and videoing Lady Amy as she graduated. Needless to say only official photographers were allowed so I think it's fair to say you seen it here first! On Bastille Day, 25 years before I had proposed to her mother in Paris. I guess some things are meant to be; others you have to make happen. C'est La Vie...Laaa

KICKER CONSPIRACY

The Bastardi! What Bastardi?...Conspiracy! What Conspiracy. The World Cup is getting to the interesting bit and there has been hardly any controversy, few, if any bastardi moments. All in all the refs have kept their distance and missed very little, took no shit and allowed the games to be played in the right spirit. Apart from England's spinleless, clueless, two banks of 5 with no midfield tactics; I think it's been the best world cup I have seen. And in Belgium v USA the best world cup game I have ever seen. The quarters await and bastardi willing I think Columbia are marching all the way to the final. Whoudda thought it? So far it has been like a good book. One you can't put down and don't want to end.

Jack in the Box

Lord Roby has a bit of free time, so what better way than to comment on the comings and goings of the premier league. Well it looks like it's going to the other shower are going to win it and if they win 14 games on the bounce, amassing a spooky 89 points in the process; then who am I to argue. Apart from having seen some of the best football I have ever seen from the Blues, I have also seen some seriously dodgy refereeing. Mark Clottenburg is undoubtedly a fully paid up member of the Bastardi!! Having not been seen for a number of years, he suddenly turns up in a number of prime, title and FA Cup deciding fixtures. At the Emirates he was 'selected' to ref the FA Cup QF. Even though he had been banned from reffing our games for 6 years and Howard Webb was available. We got denied a blatant pen and the Arse were given a soft one. Same old, same old!
Roll -on to Old Trafford. Clott had never given a pen against United there but decided that 3 were justified that day.Roll -on to Man City at Anfield.Title decider. Who turns up again, Clott!!  Man Utd at Goodison, who else!! I left when he ignored two footed tackle by Rooney!I don't think we have seen the last of him yet. He will no doubt be 'arbitrating' again before the season is out.
But at the end of the day/season the league doesn't lie and 'Chapeau' to the Reds as it looks like they are home and dry. Maybe after 24 years there is some justice after all.

Get Back

Like most good Christians and Hindus and Jews I was sickened by the goings on in Rochdale, that have been covered extensively by the media of late.However,I have been equally sickened by an article in the 'i' newspaper I read last week.In it Yasmin Alibhai-Brown laments that she was warned not to comment for fear of inflaming racial tensions.As part of her rhetoric she proposes that 'the rapists are all probably in one sense 'good' muslims' and also offers the re-assurance that 'most men who groom and rape young girls in Britain are white'.Well thanks for that Yasmin.But since you are so au fait with the definition of a 'good' muslim,can you tell me just how bad you have to be to be a 'bad' muslim.Is a bad Muslim one who refuses to rape underage girls? Is a bad muslim one who refuses to take down an American Airlines plane while simultaneously liquidising his bollocks? I really do need to know.How poetic if the rapists where fitted with 'Muslim Thunderpants' which detonated upon erection.Now that's what Lord Roby calls justice!

Little Drummer Boy

Its at this time of year my thoughts start to turn to...well Huddersfield!....For back in 1977, I decided to forego my Christmas Dinner in the forlorn hope of gatecrashing the Sex Pistols Christmas Day bash in Ivanhoes Club,Hudddersfield.We arrived there early enough to be able to walk in the place and witness the carnage that was the aftermath of the Firemans kids party.Ever the oppportunists we decided it would be a good idea to hide in the toilets.Never get found in there would we?...We were turfed out within the hour with the promise of tickets if we waited for a roadie to appear.The roadie duly appeared but wanted £3 for a £1.75 ticket.For some reason he didn't want paying for mine,so I guess mine was a freebie.Maybe I was on the guest list!

We started out in the balcony,great view but no blood sweat and tears.So I went downstairs alone.After about 10 minutes I was within touching distance of the stage, right in the middle.This was an art perfected at Clash gigs in Erics Club,Liverpool.The gig came and went with God Save The Queen at both ends.I was quite an air drummer at this time so I decided to chance my arm and jump on stage at the end and grab the last two sticks on Paul Cooks kit.Got them too! But not being satisfied, I stopped to ask John (not Johnny that would have been a bit too familiar) for the Steel Pulse badge on his lapel.He politely refused and put his left hand over it for protection.As I made my exit I paused to take the sticks from my kecks, for fear of doing myself an injury.This proved fatal, as it gave Malcolm McClaren the time to catch me(round the throat).I was nearly blue in the face by the time I let go!....The roadie feeling sorry for me, rewarded me with a 'Holidays in the Sun' poster as he took the sticks from me...the last sticks they ever played with in this country as it turned out.Still for one night only ....Huddersfield really was.. the Rock and Roll capital of the world.P.S..... Lord Roby is in the picture above.A poster for the first correct guess.And no,I am not the one in the sad Emu coat!'.

Wonderful Life

The 4th of July is notable for one thing in Liverpool; the outbreak of the Toxteth Riots.So today on local radio,we have had endless blackman bleating about how bad things were and still are for blackyouth,blackmama and blackpapa....blah....blah...blah....No mention of the white guys who were equally disenfranchised at the time and joined in to vent their anger.These were serious,full scale riots...and the plod were well and truly caught with their pants down.So lets move forward 30 years.Whats changed? Well Bob Harris has just been given a gong for his 'services' to music.Personally ,I thought the kids choir at the Palm House ,Sefton Park on Sunday did more for music in an hour but thats only my opinion.But ,what I liked,was that it was a genuinely multi racial choir, White kids,Poles,Jewish,Asian,Indian and Pakistani...only one race was missing..You've guessed it 'the blackman who got a lorra problems'....I see it.or rather don't see time and time again.I don't see blackman at the theatre,the museum.Dont even see him in B and bastard Q....Don't see him walkin his dog.....or at the summer fete or playing golf,cricket or anything for that matter.Didn't see him at all amongst 75,000 whiteys at Aintree for the Grand National.Maybe he was at dem Camptown Races....Black people in Liverpool live in Liverpool 8 'ghetto' because they choose to,,they don't get involved because they choose not to.All other races are present throughout Liverpool and it's conurbations.All blackman seems interested in is 'eatin jerk chicken and bangin booty....It's a wonderful life in L8

Little Willy

Recently, Lord Roby had the pleasure of his attendung his first beer festival.It was long overdue.Because I was attending on my Jack Jones I was a bit apprehensive.Would I fit in? Would there be any eye candy or would it just be a bunch of old Swan types.(The Swan is a well established real ale boozer in downtown Liverpool for the uninitiated.) It turned out to be full of old Swan types and students.I didn't fit in.So there was no alternative but to talk to the beer.First up was Straw Dog.Very nice indeed.Next up Durdle Door(from Dorset no doubt).Also very palatable.This was followed by a gill of Palm.I can't remember what this one was like,but it was nice enough to imbibe.I was now racing headlong into the second hour.By this time I was also starting to practice my 'Liver Dance'.Edinburgh Gold was a reluctant choice but I felt I had patronise the locals.It was absolutely spiffing.By now I was like a kid in a sweet shop.I couldn't get enough of the stuff down my neck quickly enough.I was in a beer frenzy.I somehow had the sense to put all the names of the different brews in my mobile phone.I was starting to run out of consciousness ; and so had to pick the next brew with care.Corncrake!! That's the one for me.Another winner,I was beginning to feel like it was time to 'walk'.I had over-imbibed by some degree.I had enough cells left for 'just one more'.There it was staring right at me.Mersey Mist.No don't ask me why but this was the only beer I could remember the flavour of.Maybe it was because it was a wheat beer made by Liverpool 1 that tasted of orangesages and lemons.Delish.

It was time to leave.I had spent the best two hours imaginable and spent all of £20 and let's just say I left 'Liver Dancing' and very,very..'Mersey Mist'!!!