Should I Stay Or Should I Go

As I was walking down the Frog and Toad the other day I nearly stood on a Richard the Third.Being a responsible chappie I wondered what to do about the Richard the Third to prevent anybody else making a mess of themselves.I decided to try and pick up the Richard the Third.This proved more difficult than I imagined because it wouldn't keep still. When I finally managed to pick it up;with two hands,as it was rather large;I noticed a ring on it's left leg.It was a rather fine specimen of the genus Racing Pigeon( Fugitus Mickus).As it was totally exhausted I decided to take it home and try to contact the Nearly Dead Pigeon's Society.This was no trouble to someone like myself, who as a ragamuffin child spent plenty of time in pigeon lofts.Usually other peoples in the dead of night!! I rang the hotline and gave in the number on the ring,only to be told that the owner was no longer racing pigeons so the computer said I couldn't have his contact details.I was now the unwitting owner of orphan GB 98 J 29924.Apparently the 98 is the date of birth,which at 12 years old makes it rather an old bird,which presumably makes it a successful bird,since pigeons fanciers take no prisoners when it comes to tardy Micks.However,the bird, now known affectionately as Long John Silver Blue because it's always standing on one leg,steadfastly refuses to leave the comfort of my shed.I leave the door open but no luck.I even left it's food bowl by the open door.When I came back there was no sign of LJSB.But only because it had bedded down in some straw on the floor! Maybe it has only flown when racing, but then I'm not about to take it to Whitchurch to find out it's back in the shed before I'm back over Runcorn Bridge.It seems perfectly happy with it's lot,and I've got no problem buying a bag of cracked corn every now and then.So I guess it's here to stay until such times as it decides to go.