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The little beauty of a medal above is interesting on a number of levels.Transcribed on the obverse is the following." Everton Football Club 1890-1891". Now a little bird once told me that the Liver Bird, so revered by our illustrious neighbours Liverpool FC, used to belong to Everton FC!! At first I liked the idea of it but could not substantiate this unlikely fact.That is until you delve into the history of the aforementioned medal.In 1890-91 Everton won the league title for the first time.Since the previous winners Preston N.E. had nothing to show for their efforts; Everton decided to commemorate this and cast the medal shown.Thereby inventing the league championship medal.One of our many footballing firsts.Look closer into the heart ot the medal and you will see a certain little dicky bird.The Liver Bird no less.Doesn't prove anything.....except that it does,when you realise Liverpool FC were not established until 1892!! How and when it was stolen from us, is still a mystery.However, in this Derby week and in the spirit of reconciliation, I think it's about time this little dicky bird found it's way home to roost.Dont you?
After a pretty ropey Christmas and New Year due to family problems allied to a car crash just before Christmas; I was beginning to wonder when I was going to get my smile back.Would it be the blues on the way up,or maybe the reds on the way down.Nope neither.The ongoing saga of the car crash has finally borne some fruit.Since liability for the accident was admitted within 24 hours,I felt I had a pretty strong hand.So imagine my dismay when I was offered a Skoda(?) to replace my treasured Audi A6 Quattro.Something didn't add up.So I knocked it back.I was then advised that my choices where limited due to my car being over 6 years old;the best they could do was a Ford Mondeo.Sorry,not havin it! After a few heated discussions my solicitor contacted them with a few home truths.Bingo! A Mercerdes C180K Sport arrived first.Next day, a call asking would I like to swap for a Mercedes S Class.Yes please! Then today, another call telling me that there was a Jaguar XF with my name on it, if I wanted it for the duration.I haven't stopped smiling all day.Even after Liverpool winning.What a beast.I would never have believed a diesel could go so fast or be so damn beautiful.I suppose it's a triumph for doggedness above all else.I think I'll be sleeping with the 'cat' tonight.
Perversion reached new highs(or should that be lows) recently when Kieron Bobbette pleaded guilty to 5 counts of sexual assault at Hove Crown Court.His 'crime'...was chasing teenage girls until he was able to ride piggyback on them!! Bobette (no relation to John Wayne Bobbit or John Wayne for that matter) "denied that any sexual gratification was involved but accepted that there was a sexual element in the offences".The new offence of "Bobbetteing" has now entered the criminal psyche.Beware...what next?..The playground game of "May I" will only be acceptable if the answer is "Yes you may",Will "Floretta" be outlawed for fear of paedo attraction.And what about (god forbid).. the "Three legged race"!!!! Can you imagine poor Bobbette in the 'Nonce Wing' of the local jail. "And what you in here for.....Errr Piggyback riding" I guess it takes all sorts Bertie.....Anyone for Wheelbarrows?
Last weekend Lord Roby was at a loose end.To spice things up a little he decided to have a little flutter.There is a new kinda bet in town.It's called Goals Galore.The premise is quite simple.All you have to do is pick football matches in which both teams will score.The more you get right,the more you win.However, get one wrong and it's curtains.Being a greedy bastard ,Lord Roby went for ten! If nothing else at least I would have plenty of scanning to do as the results started to come in.The first six came in rather quickly.Sheff Weds 1 -QPR 2,Aston Villa 5-Bolton 1,ManCity 3- Burnley 3, Wigan 1-Fulham 1,Falkirk who were bottom of the league drew 3-3 with Celtic who were top after being 0-0 at half-time! Number 6 was Blackpool 4,Scunthorpe 1.I was now starting to twitch The problem was that time was running out.Newcastle were winning 3-0,Tottenham were winning 1-0, and Blackburn were winning 3-0,but worst of all Notts Forest were drawing 0-0.Things were beginning to look hopeless until Portsmouth scored against Blackburn.7 up! With 10 minutes to go Peterborough pulled a goal back against Newcastle.Then with 5 minutes to go Notts Forest broke the deadlock.All I could do was stare at the TV and will the other two to score.Stone me! In the last minute Bristol City scored an equaliser!!!! I was now panting/ hyperventilating.All that left, was Sunderland to score. And then........the Sunderland and England striker Darren Bent breaks clear.Clean through on goal.The goalkeeper pulls him down.Penalty!! (and the goalkeeper sent off!!!!) Except, the referee inexplicably decides to only show the keeper a yellow card.Darren Bent steps against his old club and the keeper who isn't supposed to be there, saves his penalty.Bastardo!!! Tottenham run out 2-0 winners.If the penalty had been scored my meagre £3 bet would have returned the princely sum of £2103.The way things are at the moment the only luck I am getting is bad luck.Say La V
Jamie Janes: An apology from Jocky Brown
Janie Jones was a great soldier.Unfortunately one day his Ford Cortina just ran out of fuel on the battlefield.My sympathies go out to his mother Jack Jones.
As a soldier Jimmy James was no slouch,nor was he a vagabond.He was just working for the clampdown.His 'Mary Doll' said 'if he had had any career opportunities he wouldnae have been there at all.'
As a soldier Jim Jams worked tirelessly for his troop.Often going days without sleep chasing insurgents.
As a soldier Jammie Jim was no dodger.To imply that, really is taking the biscuit!
If there any typos in this please forgive me as I only have one eye,..it's Brown...and I frequently talk out of it !!
RIP Jamie Janes....It's hard to defend yourself when all you have is a snub nosed 44.
'ELEVATOR GOING UP'
Somethings are beyond my comprehension.Not many.But some.The stance being taken by Liverpool and Man Utd over displaying poppies on their shirts this week-end is one of those incomprehensible things. Of all teams, both of these should know better.We have had many reminders down the years on the anniversary of the Munich air disaster in 1958 and it's effect on Man Utd and it's fans.Also,every year Liverpool steadfastly refuse to play on the anniversary of the Hillsborough disaster.In fact they even lobbied UEFA to prevent a european game being staged on April 15th.The reason given for not displaying poppies, in both cases was..'we do enough for the armed forces as it is'. It's not the fans idea,and I'm pretty sure it's not the players idea.That leaves the Chief Exec and the owners.In both cases American.But why should American owners have an axe to grind? If it's the cost of a new strip for a day,then the shirts would instantly become collectors items and could auctioned off at a profit,with the proceeds going to the Haig Fund; which is exactly what most clubs are doing.Man Utd stuck to their guns and played today without a poppy in sight.Liverpool play tomorrow.Lets hope they have a change of heart at the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month......
Only last week the two people above achieved greatness.Both were crowned world champions on the same day.Jenson Button won the Formula 1 title and Beth Tweddle became World Gymnastics champion(our first ever).Jenson,a self confessed playboy, no doubt spends a lot of his time in and around Park Lane,London.Young Beth spends most of her time in and around Park Road Gym,Liverpool.When asked why he thought if he had suffered for his success Jenson replied 'the G forces when cornering are like having your face ripped off!'.Believe me;if you hang aroung Park Road corners too long, in Liverpool, you will have your face ripped off!! Oh!, and Jenson was also man enough to take a £5m pay cut.Oh the humanity! I'm sure Beth would love to take a £5m pay cut too.Why the indignation? Well within minutes of winning the title,Jenson received warm congratulations from Gordon Brown.As far as I know Beth is still waiting for hers.By all accounts Beth is the perfect role model for kids and spends lots of time giving support to others and attending awards ceremonies.It looks like Gordon would rather revere someone who sits on his arse for a living, rather than someone who is a genuine inspiration to kids with no apparent prospects.When it come to Sports Personality of the Year; I know where my vote is going,and it wont be down Park Lane.
